women business owners

Mothers, is it possible to be wildly successful while raising children?

mother mompreneuer successful mothers

In a span of 2 days a friend posted on Instagram that work/life balance is hard as hell with her newborn baby, I read a post on Facebook from a woman looking for role models of inspiring, successful mothers because she needed some hope, my coaching client was struggling to balance her high level career and motherhood, and I wrote in my journal after a rough day at home with my sick toddler…

“Is this it, my f*cking life is made up of cleaning, grocery shopping, cooking and few professional successes in between? Is this really it, it doesn’t get any better than this? I’m tired, I feel like I’m being buried alive. I only feel like myself when I’m working.”

The truth is this shit is hard as hell.

I feel like mothers can be broken down into 3 stages:

Infant stage- “WTF why didn’t anyone tell me it would be this hard?”

Elementary age- “Who am I again?”

High school age- “I would give anything to squeeze their squishy toddler cheeks again.”

If you’re in the first 2 stages, I wrote this for you. So the question is, can I live in my purpose, excel at being my highest self while still being a great mother, is this at all possible?

Although I can’t say I have it all figured out and I don’t lose my mind at least once a week, I have realized with a 13, 10, and 2 year old (the last being our bonus baby) is that life goes in seasons and even if this one feels hard and overwhelming a new season is coming. I don’t believe that work/life balance is possible but that in some seasons things will get more focus than others and that’s okay.

What does being a successful mom and entrepreneur look like for you?

First, define what “success” means to you. If success for you means living in a perfectly clean home with healthy dinners on the table every night you may want to hire someone to help you. In our house we are currently doing all.the.things. and some night’s it’s fast food especially during the kids’ sports season, we do what we can, the best we can, we’ve got to let go of that mom guilt it will eat us alive.

If you’re currently doing all.the.things. too try to relax into the chaos because kids come with some major shit! There’s never a time when there aren’t toys all over my house but having two older kids I also realize that the toys will not always be here. As the kids get older the toys get smaller and then non-existent, so as I look around at the baby dolls and play food I try to relax knowing that this will not last forever.

What happens when all the plates go crashing down?

We give ourselves grace, we’re human, not robots. We need to take care of ourselves first (yes I said first) before we give everything we have away and are going to be good for no one. Take time to exercise, have a personal care routine even if that means a 5 minute makeup routine putting it on in the car after you buckle the kids in. Give yourself some time to walk around Target alone, do what you need to do to feel whole and complete. Ask for help when you need it, that is self-care.

Show up as the role model that you are.

I believe that we’re doing our children a huge service by showing them how much we love our work, what it means to be passionate and driven. They will see us typing away at night when the rest of the house is asleep, they hear us on podcasts and see us writing our books and they know that there is possibility out there in the world for them, we are showing them what’s possible.

We would lay down our own lives to save theirs but do we have to lose ourselves completely?

Know that you’re not alone, there are so many of us that feel this way, we do what we can with the season we’re in. Keep your focus on who you want to become and let it pull you forward even when it seems easier to give up. Reach out, ask for help, find a community of women that can support you when you feel like you can’t go on. We’re all in this together, raising children and the consciousness of the planet, this is no small feat so be patient, be kind and love yourself while giving them all that you can!

If you know someone who would like this article, please share it with them!

xo,

Kim

Not feeling happy? You're not alone.

Blog Happy Mother.png

If this sounds like you, first of all, you’re not alone. So many women have leaned in and whispered to me saying something similar to, “I just don’t know who I am anymore, I don’t know what my purpose is, I don’t know how to be happy.”

I’ve heard mainly from women with children, women who like me have devoted so much of their time and energy to their children that when they finally get to an age where they can do something for themselves they feel lost (or you have a surprise pregnancy that turns your world upside down and has you wondering the purpose of everything! 🙋🏼‍♀️).

But recently I met with an old friend who has no children and she said she went through a depression last year that she couldn’t explain why, she said she just felt lost. Our choices are literally endless but we feel paralyzed, terrified to make the wrong choice or just completely unsure of what we even want.

Sometimes this lack of clarity has us go in search of our purpose in life or some of us bury our feelings because the idea of doing something different and getting out of our comfort zones is too scary and overwhelming. It’s my mission to normalize these conversations so that we don’t have to go through these feelings alone. My first suggestion is to get as much clarity as you can because when you know what you don’t want, then you know what you do want. When was the last time you asked yourself what you really want?

If you would like more help I offer coaching sessions to help you realign with your purpose and help you find your happy again! Send me a message on my contact page.

xo,

Kim

When Your "Dream Job" Goes Bad

When Your Dream Job Goes Bad

I’m writing this with my freelance, service-based business owners in mind but if you’re a career gal this can work the same for you, it’s all the same process.

I’ve seen it happen so many times…

You set out to build your dream job, when you first started you were so excited to create your own schedule, set your own rates, maybe you had young children and you could work your schedule around them. It was the perfect job for you and and you were creating something beautiful.

Then 10 years goes by… you’ve become successful, you’re damn good at what you do but during this time somehow your “Dream Job” has now become your J.O.B. and not in the best way.

You feel frazzled, overwhelmed, you feel trapped. There’s no retirement fund, no 401K or insurance that keeps you there but it’s your business and it’s what you’re known for. On the outside you look successful, people respect you but there’s no movement, there’s no where to grow without adding more stress and more work. You’re burning the candles at both ends.

It’s not as much fun as you thought it would be, you can’t go on vacations or travel like you thought you could, maybe you’re missing your children’s activities or games because your schedule has you working all.the.time…You’re working your ass off like never before and you feel burnt out and stuck. YOU are your business and you’re missing out on your life.

So what do you do?

The first step is admitting how you really feel and then you need to work on getting clarity. I believe clarity is the answer for everything because when you know what you do want, then you know what you don’t want. When you’re honest with yourself you can create a plan and start moving in the right direction. Maybe you just need a mindset shift, you need to learn say “No” more and do more of the things that light you up.

Maybe it’s time to raise your rates so you can work less and make more money or it’s time to finally get the help you need and stop trying to do everything yourself. You also need to start creating a personal brand separate from your business, you don’t need different social media accounts but you do need to step out from behind your business.

If you need help getting clarity I encourage you to download my free workbook, you can download it here. You’ll receive my workbook straight to your inbox and once you complete it, I would love to hear from you in the comments. Did you have any “Aha” moments?

I’m putting together a blog post about creating a personal brand, I’ll let you know when I post on my blog but if you know you can’t wait until then I have several ways you can work with me, click here to find out more.

xo,

Kim