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How to Make Self-Care a Priority

How to Make Self-Care a Priority

Mothers and women in general are burnt the hell out, it’s a tired that no amount of sleep can cure, an emotional exhaustion that we can’t seem to crawl out of.

This conversation keeps showing up in my coaching sessions and in talking with friends, we’re at a breaking point but we don’t know how to stop it. They’re telling me in hushed whispers…

“I’m trying to do everything, I have no time to myself.”

“I’m exhausted and I lose my temper.”

“I don’t even know who I am anymore.”

You love your spouse, your kids, your life but you’re tapped out and you’re running on fumes. There’s nothing more to give but yet we keep pushing, waiting for the answer to our prayers of things to slow down, so we can stop feeling so damn stressed out and anxious all the time.

Self-care is a buzzword we hear a lot now but what does it really mean? The dictionary defines self-care as “the practice of taking action to preserve or improve one's own health.” We can’t pour from an empty cup, we need to fill ours up first so we can be all that we need to be for the one’s that we love. Especially us mothers we tend to over give of ourselves but the people who love us need us to be happy, not perfect and that means taking care of ourselves.

Maybe that means something as simple as going to get a pedicure, taking a day to read a book and drink tea alone or going on a hike and being in nature… whatever it is, you get to define what self-care is for you.

Life coach in Virginia Beach

Here are some tips to help you make self-care a priority:

Be honest with yourself

It’s time to let go of the perfect facade. Who are you trying to impress when you over volunteer your time, say “Yes” to doing things you hate, or strive for perfection for your kid’s birthday party? We have to let go of perfection, shut down Pinterest for a minute and know that done is better than perfect. If you’re overextending yourself to please others and burning yourself out in the process, get use to saying “No” more and making yourself a priority. Find a group of women that you can be authentic and real with, these women are your tribe.

Establish boundaries

Minimize the time you spend with “energy vampires” basically the people who suck the energy from you. Set your intention for how you want to feel for the day when you first wake up and if something or someone is trying to pull you from feeling the way you want to feel, try to avoid spending as much time with them. Intentions that I often set for the day are to feel calm, connected and to have fun.

Ask for help

Maybe you need to hire a sitter or ask your family for help. You could have your groceries delivered, have someone clean your house, whatever you can do to take some things off your plate so you don’t feel so overwhelmed. We can not nor should we try to do all the things by ourselves, ask for help when you need it and try to ask before you feel the overwhelm as it’s harder to shift out of when you’re in it, with an overflowing calendar of responsibilities.

Make a happy list

Have a list of 20 or more things that you love to do that make you feel seriously happy. This could be listening to you favorite music, dancing in the kitchen while making your kid’s lunches, spending quiet time meditating for a few minutes each day or going to a dance class. This is your list of the things that bring you the most joy, refer to this list often and incorporate as many as you can each day.

Schedule it

If it’s not in the calendar, it’s not going to happen! We are busy and we often put others before ourselves so we have to schedule our self-care time just like everything else. Putting ourselves first is hard and can bring up negative feelings. Let yourself feel them, maybe write them down in your journal and think back to a time when you were told or shown that in order to be liked you had to be everything to everyone or you aren’t a good mother unless you’re running yourself ragged.

Let me know in the comments, are you feeling burnt out? If you currently have a self-care practice and are making it a priority in your life, share with us in the comments.

If you’re feeling the burn and want more help contact me to set up a coaching session, I can help you work through your feelings and give you tools to minimize the stress and anxiety that you’re feeling so you can feel happier and more fulfilled in your life.

xo,

Kim

Image credit: Djordje Petrovic via Canva

Body Image & Confidence with Aimee Beltran

Today I had Aimee Beltran in my studio talking about body image, confidence and living our best lives! 

If you've ever held yourself back or have been afraid of being seen, in this video we talk about our own personal experiences and Aimee gives us some tips on living our lives more confidently!

Aimee Beltran is the CEO and founder of Irresistible YOUniversity, the Irresistible You podcast, author of the Amazon Hot New Seller, The Irresistible You Journal, and the blog, Irresistible Icing. Through her coaching, courses, and content, she empowers women to boost their confidence and improve body image to create the irresistible life they crave.

To find out more about Aimee go to: https://irresistibleicing.com/

To purchase the journal go to: https://amzn.to/2FquJEz

If you deal with any of these issues or had an “aha” moment while watching, we would love to hear from you in the comments!

xo,

Kim

Goal Setting the Right Way!

goalsetting

You have to know where you're going before you can actually get there, forget about New Year's resolutions and focus on creating goals with soul!

I created this free workbook for those that want to see big changes in their lives and manifest things they could only dream about.

Get the workbook: Personal Power Workbook

In 2012 my sister convinced me to take an online Vision & Goal Setting Workshop, I thought it was silly and a waste of my time and boy was I wrong! As a freelance makeup artist for brides I had booked only 6 weddings by the end of 2012 so when I took this workshop I created some big goals for myself.

By the following year I had 31 weddings booked, opened my makeup studio, created a makeup line and hired assistants to work on my team. I grew my business to amazing heights I could have only dreamed about with my work being featured in national magazines, getting hired to do makeup for television like The Dr. Phil show and doing makeup for presidential campaigns hanging out with the Secret Service!

I was mind blown at how much I was able to accomplish in such a small amount of time and I went on a journey to find out how it was possible! I’ll tell you that goal setting from where you are right now will only lead to frustration and loss of motivation which is why most gyms are empty by February!

I think you will find this workbook will open your eyes to the possibilities that are waiting for you and I would love to hear what comes up for you! Comment here, send me a message on social media or an email at info@kimportertv.com!

Check out this testimonial… "I finished my Personal Power Workbook...it wasn't easy it took me a week. Guys, if you haven't done this do it and then give Kim the biggest hug ever. Do it in a Zen state, relaxed and open minded.

Allow yourself to really dig deep into you! Put aside everything else in your life while doing it. I promise you won't regret taking the time, you won't recognize yourself afterwards. I literally finished and reread some of my answers. It gave me a new fresh outlook on where I want to be personally and professionally.

I had to be raw and vulnerable. I had to think about my success and I don't always do that. It made me have so many emotions while doing it, it’s powerful and positive and it puts everything into perspective. I promise you will say, ’Wow, I got this shit!!’. “

- Audra Cindric, owner of Simply Elegant by Audra

Get the workbook: Personal Power Workbook

xo,

Kim

Social Media Tips for Your Business

Using social media to market your business is a no-brainer! Here are some tips to help you create better content. If you are interested in joining my Inner Circle Coaching Group to receive monthly training videos go to Inner Circle.

If you want increase your visibility on search engines and social media consider adding video to your marketing plan.

xo,

Kim

 

 

 

How to Vision & Goal Setting

 

There are some things that are just instrumental in taking yourself and your business to the next level. I want share with you how I went from from booking 6 weddings to 50 weddings in just 3 years in my makeup artistry business!

Writing you Vision, which I like to call your Ultimate Vision, is a snapshot in time of your life 10 years from now.

What are you doing?

Who are you with?

What do you see?

Use your 5 senses to write down as much detail as you can. Once you have completed your Ultimate Vision, work backwards to set clear goals, I call this Reverse Engineering Your Life.

You will have 3 section of Goals:
Personal
Career
Health

Within each section you'll have 1, 3, and 5 year Goals. It doesn't have to be hard and fast goals either, it can be a feeling like in Danielle Laporte's "The Fire Starter Sessions" where she uses your Core Desired Feelings to define your goals. If you haven't read this book, I strongly recommend it.


At the end of 2012, when I first learned about Vision & Goal Setting, I thought about my long-term vision and I wrote down my goals for the first time ever. I got really clear on what I wanted and let myself dream bigger than I've ever let myself before. I was booked for just 6 weddings that year, our youngest at the time was getting ready to go to school full-time and I knew if I was going to really build my business, it was now or never.


My List of Goals in 2012 (some were 5 - 10 year goals):

 

  • Create a makeup line

  • Book 30 weddings

  • Open a makeup studio

  • Hire a team of artists

  • Increase my income


By 2015 I had nailed ALL of them, booking 50 weddings that year and increasing my income that far surpassed what I was making working full-time in retail. I was amazed, I couldn't believe how fast everything had manifested. I knew then just how powerful it was to get clear on what you want and just go for it. 

If you do this exercise I would love to hear from you!

xo,

Kim

How to Use Video in Your Business

You've heard that video is where it's at and you know video will add value to your clients/customers, so why aren't you doing it?

Some of the reasons I've heard from women is:

"I hate the way I sound"

"I hate the way I look"

"I feel ridiculous"

Let me share with you a stat I found online...

"Online videos will account for 80% of all consumer traffic by 2020"(Cisco)

Facebook is prioritizing video, especially live video, above everything else. This means that if you want you business page to be seen, you need to be posting video. So that means you'll have to get over it and do it even though you feel ridiculous!

Here are my Top 10 Tips to Filming a Better Video (and Getting People to See It!)

1. Lighting: Get yourself some good lighting, it will make you look and feel great in your video. I suggest getting a ring light, I bought mine online at Stellar Lighting Systems.

2. Sound: Make sure you keep outside noises to a minimum and get a microphone so that you know your audience can hear you clearly, just watch it if you have long hair!

3.  Background: Try to find a wall or corner that isn't cluttered to use as your backdrop. If your audience is focused on looking at everything around you, they aren't focused on you!

4.  Appearance: I know as a woman you are hard on yourself but don't be, you do not need a hair and makeup team to feel confident on video. Some strategic makeup applications to maximize your features and minimize any (perceived) flaws is all you need! Most of the time if I'm filming at my home I'm in my yoga pants and just throw on a top because that's all you're going to see anyway.

5.  Take Notes: I have some serious A.D.D. sometimes so having at least some notes with bullet points helps to keep me on track.

6.  Share it Social Media: Share it on your social before you go live to get more eyes and share it after on all your social with a call to action.

7.  Catchy Description: Use a description that will catch people's attention, let them know what it is you will be talking about, and use emojis to be more visible.

8.  Introduction: You have about 8 to 10 seconds at the start of a video for people watching to know that they are interested in sticking around to watch or not. Save the formal intro for a minute of two and focus on the beginning on catching the attention of your audience.

9.  Be Inspiring, Informative, and/or Funny: No one wants to watch a boring video so unless you are trying to attract super low-key peeps you have to pump it up a little. Be excited and be passionate so that those watching get excited with you!

10.  Give a Call to Action: After you wrap up your top give your audience a call to action to like, follow, and share to help build your audience.

I hope this helps! If you found value in this please share it and leave a comment, I would love to hear from you.

xo,

Kim